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Many of us have been there before; you’re at the bar or pub with a bunch of girlfriends, and you have a bit too many. You see a super cute guy sitting a few tables down… and he looks at you and smiles. You get butterflies as he walks over to say hi. Next thing you know, you’re back at your place with him and the rest is history.
The next morning, part of you feels really guilty for having a one night stand with a guy you barely know, but you really felt a connection with him… and you really wanted that connection to continue. So what do you do? How do you turn that one night stand into something more meaningful… well, I’m here to help!
1.) Make sure you build a connection OUTSIDE the bedroom. This is one of the most important tips I can give you… make sure you’re fun to hang out with when you aren’t naked. Just keep the tone light and funny and try and engage in a myriad of intellectual conversations. Pique his interest by showing that you’re funny, smart, and easy going. In order to build a bond that lasts, making him like your personality is key to keeping his attention and building a possible relationship.
2.) Tip two, make sure the sex is good. The first night of sex is rarely the best sex, but if the chemistry simply isn’t there, you’re going to lose his interest. The best way to ensure that he keeps coming back for more is to make it known to him that he was performing well. In most cases, that’s the only thing a guy really craves after the first time you have sex – validation that he’s GOOD. If he feels that you’re giving him this sort of respect, he’ll be coming back for more.
3.) Tip three, do NOT get clingy. I know, it can be hard especially if you like the guy a lot, but men are super sensitive to this right after a one night stand…especially if he’s an attractive guy. During the morning after, offer to help clean up if it’s his place and then politely be the one to bow out… don’t give him any inkling that you’re looking to overstay your welcome. Just make sure you get his number!
4.) Tip four, don’t talk about the future…yet. After a one night stand, emotions are high… and when emotions are high, it’s easy to talk about the things that are really bugging you… but do your best to resist the urge to talk about anything serious. Treat the situation in such a way that is nonchalant, fun, and light hearted. Remember, you’ve just met! There’s a lot more hanging out to do before you take it to that level.
5.) Tip five…give him some room to breathe. After you leave, you don’t want to bombard him with text messages. This is obvious. Of course you want to set up another date and see him again, but in his mind, he’s already won the proverbial race…he’s slept with you. In order for him to chase you, you’re going to have to create a bit of mystery… you want to make him wonder if you’ll ever sleep with him again or if you thought that it was a mistake.
6.) Tip six… let the situation rest for a day… and if he doesn’t contact you within 24 hours, send him a light hearted text message. You could say something like, “I really had a lot of fun the other night! Would love to hang out again.” And just leave it as that. You don’t want to sound too aggressive and you don’t want to make it seem like you want to be just friends with benefits. Leave the ball in his court to see if he wants to pursue it any further. Alternatively, you could send him a funny GIF or comic to break the ice… then start a fun conversation from there. Whatever you do, don’t push for anything too serious… just keep things fun for now.
7.) Tip seven… don’t sleep with him again right away. This is a mistake that a lot of women make… once they sleep with a guy, they feel compelled to sleep with them immediately. But again, at the beginning of any relationship, you want to make sure that the guy has something to chase and fight for. If you’re giving it to him too easily, he’ll lose interest and eventually leave. Make things interesting by playing a little hard to get from time to time. For more info on how you can do this, again, just head over to CoachNorth.com.
There you have it, 7 tips for dealing with a one night stand. If you have any questions, feel free to ask them in the comments section below and I’ll do my darndest to get back to you. Hope you enjoyed this video and talk to you soon!